Tuesday, 10 May 2011

On Opening the Gates of Hell

I am very loyal to my friends. They can be on-line chums like K who write to me from time to time, or people that I am close to in real life like Raven or Svetlana. In fact, if you are a friend then I can usually forgive your little errors, especially if you not only apologise, but stand your ground afterwards. Doing a runner whilst screaming sorry over your shoulder is not a good idea as it leaves me thinking that you don't really mean it.

Let me give you an example of this attitude at work, and we shall use Svetlana to illustrate the theme. I thought about her the other day as it is now exactly a year since a rather foolish little slapper tried some prick teasing games with me. I remember that when I told the tale to Sveta she hooted with laughter as she was most impressed by the fact that a female had managed to put one over on yours truly. Trust me it takes a lot to impress Svetlana...

Sveta and I first met in about 1990 when she was one of the first of the Russian whores who now bless London with their presence. She didn't speak much English back in those days and I had the the job of driving her and some other Russian trollops around the capital from hotel to hotel. However, a lack of English was not the main reason why I acted as the tarts' driver, that had more to do with the fact that within weeks of arriving in England our Slavic friends had acquired a well-deserved reputation for chicanery, so the classier agencies hired drivers to keep an eye on them.

Bless her, but she was always trying to pull fast ones, and usually sought to involve me in the deal, but I never went along with her wheezes. I was getting paid cash in hand, and the agency manageress would tell one of the girls to give me a freebie at least once a week, so why should I make waves? The only thing that Svetlana could realistically offer me as an inducement was herself, so it amused me to ask the manageress to give me Sveta for my freebie.

Obviously she hated me for that, which was fine because I didn't like her all that much at the time, either. On the other hand you don't have to like a woman to fuck her so long as she has a nice juicy pussy. Come on, fellows, you know it's the truth.

Gradually Sveta stopped sniping at me and I stopped teasing her for having to give me for free that which she had tried to offer as a bribe and eventually we became friends. For years afterwards whenever I was in London we would meet up and I would buy her dinner in a nice restaurant, and she would then go to work on her back, or doggie-style, depending on my mood that night. However, what she never did was try to pull any more fast ones because she knew that it wouldn't work.

All this brings me in a roundabout sort of way to the events of last May and to a girl who did try it on and who got away with it for three or four days until she gave her game away with her fat, stupid mouth. You can read the whole sorry saga at this link, but for the purposes of this tale I just need to say that I told the story to Svetlana and her hoots of laughter were enough to waken the dead.
"So you give up time for girl who does not pay in proper manner," gloated Svetlana.


"You give girl taste of belt?"

"She lives miles away. Have you any idea how much it costs to fill up an XJS?"

"You have Jaguar car?"

"Er, yes."

"You want give me taste of belt?"

I couldn't stop laughing. Actually, the car belonged to a friend of mine, but I did have the use of it and didn't want to overtax poor Sveta's brain with extraneous information.

So there you are. Play straight with me, and I will be your pal and will play straight with you. Fuck with me and I will crucify you. That attitude extends to my pals who seek my help. So for instance, if Raven had been unhappy over the past two weeks because of what people had been saying about her and if that unhappiness had been exacerbated  by a blog posting then obviously I would be very annoyed on her behalf. That has not happened of course, so we are just talking hypothetically.

However, if it did happen, then I would open the gates of Hell.

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